Trauma
For the last 8 years I live in agony. In the morning when it is time to get up I do not want to get up; I have not slept properly, and I am exhausted. I am controlled by fear. I am scared to do the things I have to do and I freeze in fear when I try to do them. I know I am going to fail as I failed so much in last 8 years and now there is no way to fix it. I can try to fix only the last few failures, but it feels impossible. I am being crushed by corrupt system.
However, it does not have to be this way. I wish I could help any other injured person to avoid all this agony, as I wish someone would have helped me. But I was not able to find help. I am not in position to help others yet, as I need help myself. However, I can share my story and I hope it can help. What I have wrote so far would have helped me a lot already. All this site is about helping other people to avoid same agony as I am still going through.
For information how to deal with police, insurance and other related stuff, please read road traffic injury.
For information about the trauma, consequent Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, its affects and how you can reduce risk and impact of it, please continue reading this page. Trauma and its impact are getting studied better and there is more information about it, comparing to what I was able to find when I got injured. I collect useful link in a separate page Useful resources.
Physical brain injury
I just got confirmation that I have physical brain injury. I wish I find out earlier. I am not ready to talk about it yet.
You need help
After getting hit by a car I learned about corruption in police, negligence of medical professionals, evil insurance company and scamming solicitors. I was very capable person before, who was going through challenges like they were easy, but now I was easily manipulated, lied and abused. After trauma you will need help, there is very high chance you will not be able to cope with it on your own.
Over time I found some things that were useful, and I would like to share it with you:
Price of giving up
The most common advice I got was: give up and move on. These were the people who do not want to help you (too lazy or do not want you to succeed) and giving advice that seems the best for them at the time. However, it is a terrible way to go. You can not ignore trauma. It does not work this way. The price of giving up is you life. You will not be able to sleep, relax, focus, or do the the things you used to do. You will need to go back and address it or live the rest of your life in miserable existence.
Diary
Journaling is one of the useful tools while dealing with PTSD, brain injury or many other mental health challenges. I place my Diary online with the thought that it might help other people facing similar challenges.